You Felt For Me But I Fell For You

Place. Silence. Time. Still. Love. Kills. Thoughts. Cold. Distance. Close.....

It s just when I go to sleep...your the first one who enevolpes my being...my heart is strangled in your core...of disaster, struggles and guilty pleasures.

Dearest i've dreamt of you while I was awake...I saw your image being dispensed in the flame....I saw your downfall...come to think of it it was just yesterday..

Unused tissues were my company when I felt you escaping me....darling the sobbing cries echoed in this dark lovable nest....treasured without and within the gray cement cheap bricks we stacked together to declare whose dying but lives longer with the pains from the past...

Letters were burned....feelings were tucked away beneath the blankets that were soft, pure and cleansed fabrics with red stiches that we.....

I am just praying for a bittersweet day when you be abused, distuniguished with depression because i'm fed up with it being always I who suffers the best.

End here, Tears Dry, Lips Smile, You Dissappear or Die.

Unknown. Whisper. Ends. Moves. Death. Love. Express. Warm. Closer. Gone...

----------------------------------------------------------------

why am i writing a story when i have an algebra test tomorow....i need to get some rest oh yes and tomorow i will be scored with pencils of the heart judged on something on a day i was stressed not myself....anywhoo inshallah it turns out for the best be it bad or good....

I Dont Want You Back...

Nothing. That was all she could comprehend from this encounter, speechless and ackward. She thought what was meant to be shall feel as was said to feel...but oh how shamefully she was wrong. Her actions, reactions and suspicions were now being projected against him.

Defined. Every sway from her body explained the truth to him. Full of suggestions and analytical realizations. Yet why did she still intrigue him when her soul was as dark as his shoes, and her lips were crimson roses waiting to be touched.

Attraction. She repels his eye contact by placing her attention on his gray, smooth button. He twitches his lips and struggles to communicate what's on his mind. Step forward, takes a step back...bleed....bruised smile and fine she suggests you take the lead.

Confused. Exactly with defeaning voices surrounding them, right and wrong is meaningless as their steps lead them towards the ....


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
did you like the story...or was it horrible, confusing and terrible?:) anywhoo....these long days have identified the fake and truthful *r*e*n*s... now i understand that equation of ... will never equal ... because some people are just superifical......

No Struggles Just Pain & Pleasure

Plan A ---> out of the picture...too tiresome...difficult
Plan B ---> in but out .........too depressing...and yet beautiful
Plan C ----> perfect.....no struggles, just pain and pleasures

------------------------------------------------

today is the marker of a new begining in the life of this battlefield
i'm finally getting somewhere
wish you the best as well

downfall: finals in less than two weeks....god save me....:)

Feeling Poetic So I Wrote This

(not dedicated to anyone...just words without meanings or is it meaningul ?!:))


Alas my darling i've seen the truth
This life was never about me and you
It was never what we sought to feel
We were just sad ridden souls
Trying to pave paths that would lead
To a far away somewhere place
Erase the guilt from their face

But for now I suggest we take a break from living
And search for the dead souls lying within ourselves
Because strangely i'm getting old
And well your forgetting the best of days
Feeling restless

So what was thought to be
Is never what it seems to me
Good night begotten farewell in my dreams

-your battlefield-

"i vow never to forget you....just erase your presence from thou heart"

to whomever leaves a comment, may i make a suggestion that you make it poetic and rhyming...whomever you are....show me the talent thats hidden but for now shall be shown...am waiting anxiously ;) enjoy

Is This Life Tempting or Just Stressing??

my days to come and stil am feeling sick and unwell

saturday: i have a history test (god save me) i cant miss that day in school cuz if i do ill be taking a *&%^ing hard test.....which happens to those that skip it but if i skipped it i would have a reason that being "dying trying hard to get out of bed but im so dizzy, feel like *$rfing and headache."

sunday: i have a semi like final test in chemistry but though not the final those are in 2 weeks :( help me...and also i have a real final in another class now what do you say....i need your time, mine has run out... :( lend your minutes :)

moday-wednesday: quizes, tests, and damn toooo much to do in so little time

the days keep getting more stressful as i go along but inshallah everything that happens is for a reason and then come the end of the next 20 OMG 20 DAYS LEFT

sooooooo longggg
i cant wait...patience is running low
everything is running low

now i shall go about this day hitting the books and trying to understand the crap that i will be tested on next weeeek..........my life doesnt seem tempting does it :)

but i still feel ----- and i hope i can get something done this weekend because am in no mood to stay up late in the night :O( studying my @** ooff



struggle, supress, strength, sense, since, sick, stumble, suprise, survive ;) the s's in my life

Aren't I Cute.....*blushes*

i feel ill, tired, unwell
sleepy, lazy, headache
stomachache and now
i shall go sleep
and dream of ...
what my beautiful commentors shall say ;)

GoodNite

Secret Window

No Not the Secret Window to my Heart ;) smartie

the movie...i just finished watching it and no words can sum up my reaction.......simply speechless...i let you be the judge....watch it or if you've seen it tell me what you thought....:)

----------------------

"Todd Downey thought that a woman
who would steal your love...
            
...when your love was really all you
had, was not much of a woman.

   He, therefore, decided to kill her.
               
He would bury her in
the deep corner formed...

where the house and the barn
came together at an extreme angle.

               
He would bury her where
his wife kept her garden.

               
The garden she loved
more than she loved him."

---------------------

"'I know I can do it, '
Todd Downey said...
  
...helping himself to another ear
of corn from the steaming bowl.

      
'I'm sure that in time...
       
...every bit of her will be gone.

    
And her death will be a mystery...

               
...even to me. "'

now i must find the book that was based on this movie...must read it, simply enthralling and ;)

No Comment

The below I dedicate to myself....Your Battlefield ;) when all else fails refer to the below and you can make it past all those obstacles just believe and you can achieve ;)

Emily Dickinson
Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul. And sings the tune without the words, and never stops at all.

Aristotle
Hope is a waking dream.

Barbara Kingsolver
Hope is a renewable option: If you run out of it at the end of the day, you get to start over in the morning.

Anne Lamott
Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don't give up.

Geoffrey Gaberino
The real contest is always between what you've done and what you're capable of doing. You measure yourself against yourself and nobody else.

Marcus Garvey
If you have no confidence in self, you are twice defeated in the race of life. With confidence, you have won even before you have started.

William J.H. Boetcker
Your success depends mainly upon what you think of yourself and whether you believe in yourself.



_______________________________________________________________________
on another note: i sense i will be getting sick or ill come the next few days i just dont feel like myself lately.....stomachache :( i hate being sick.................:o(

Hope Is Gone

when to give up and when to give in....?

this song sums up my feelings....cross out love and include ....!! nothing to say!....

total eclipse of the heart-bonnie tyler

not the song that sums up my thoughts the one below is just give this one a listen its sung orginally by her not dan.

total eclipse of the heart-the dan band

i dont really care if you believe i should have censored it or so...but today is not my day...never has been nor shall end to be....i'm just down....every lyrics you hear sung by him and her is true and can relate to me...i shed a few tears today since my hope is gone and ... show me how i can find a glimpse of hope when everything is shattered??!!

once upon a time i was falling down
now im falling apart

Look Into My Eyes

Do you see your reflection?


just out of nowhere i ask you when you look into someone's eyes while speaking to them do you see your reflection in their glistening eyes or just their soul and nothing else more??

good thing is school is almost out, bad thing is finals are coming up already getting the dose of projects, quizes, tests, etc you name it i have it and then the year ends and i'll feel this empty void within me....am scared i dont want to be a senior it only means that i will no longer be a child in one sense....i will go out into this gruesome harsh yet beautiful world and be something...but i still want the option of curling in my bed and being able to cry carelessly when all goes wrong...am i asking too much if all i want is for time to stop so i can take this all in....a few more days and ill be on the verge of a breakdown because school will be out and then i have to start my college decisions but damn i forgot i have to fill this application out for recommendation crap for the counselor before the year is out and i only answered one out of seveenteen questions...ironic i am also seventeen... will someone save me from this nightmare that is yet in motion...no intermission or break.....please give me the anecdote to this ... is there one and if so how would it help?...again nonsense is all i am...come to think of it why is my name not nonsense instead of your battlefield...anywhoo let me mull over my decisions, thoughts and get back to livin life for each moment because truthfully you can never predict your time on this earth and inshallah all goes well from her to then when... :(

i guess my blog is just the daily struggles of a girl within this gut wrenching, blood thristy battlefield.

: l

Memories Of Shadows

The World Through The Eyes Of A Battlefield
Nothing tempting
Just feels empty
For Now!

Whats to say? Not the same!! Only I can understand those words alone....because there's a difference between wisdom and relivance...my nonsense will never give way, my true self shall be left to blame....For now I shall mourn my better self thats disappeared within these exasperating days of school, stress, and relaxation doesnt beg to make a difference....it only further creates an alliance with my fake unreal self...nothing can make a difference...difference except a chocolate fudge brownie thats as big as a desk so I can gobble it down and feel full without being my true self of empty....

If you havent understood what I just wrote about above then dont try because its hard to do...well my post I have no clue what type of feeling its expressing to you its that these long, hot days have changed my ways....notably for the bad and then some good....anyways ..begone for now and then when I figure what i'm all about I shall return with some goodies and some wisdom of something other than doodles and writings...

All my nonsense may change come a few hours but now I have awoken from unused dreams that need...must led to something...I think I shall focus more on my studies, take a break from those doodling dreams and then we can see what goes on from there.....

~~~!@yham 7@lw@i !~~~

If Pain is Love Then Love is Death ?

blah.

silence.

reliance.

deliberance.

intelligence.

sleepiness.

bleh.

insert life here

the battlefield

out of reach

call again.....currently disconnected

notified just in case


"if pain is love then love is death, would hate be peaceful and revenge be fate??" what do you say...

Fi Elbidaya.....Fi Ni7aya

Dearest darling,

Today you've turned a year older, and i've become a day wiser understanding the inevitable truth. Forever and always were the words I pledged to you. But now their just overused pathetic words. I scorched so many pages in this notebook leaving just this page for you. The others were wasted drawing images inflicted by you, that defined your hate. I would dream for your repentance and the day that you might see me still. But i can never forgive those who have forgotten me and never knew me well.

I cried in the process of writing you this letter, of ending my decietful lie, that someday you might fall in love with me and at that time I can make you cry. These drying tear's on this painful letter will be erased with time, but dont think they were never here because darling i'm crying crimson tears. Flooding this white paper with scars and fears....no longer able to settle all thats been and all thats gonna be.....END here END there, doesnt matter because their was never a start...so how define a postion when you've been their all along??....

This letter shall be sent to you the day people pay their respects to me, my body, my soul, my everything...it's the day when i will no longer be...on this planet or that shadow facing you defenselessly. So without breaking my heart, without damaging my soul, the ending i began to a start unknown. Always and for all, never witnessed laughter or smiles for thou soul....goodbye forever and never more....i'm resting peacefully no longer worrying about this broken heart.


Her Soul,

The Battlefield


Well i just finished a chemistry test and it was hard, difficult not what i expected and with or without the studying i just oooof anywhoo away from depressing news to something special and thats gonna shine me with glitter and light.....yes you might have noticed my jackie posted a post on GINA....yes our Gina is coming home and well i missed her endlessly and we got lots to catch up on so with that my days will be fulled with smiles and laughter....they already are but she'll add more to it....the above was just again meaningless words i wrote....because i dont feel like starting on the project due come the morrow or studying for the english test...:( anywhoo enjoy. smile. cheers. c ya later...and :* excuse the change in font size...something messed up happened and i cant bring it back to normal sorry

Minor Thing

today oh today what can i say!!! i met the most kindest soul ever seriously....you would have never guessed someone would be that sweet...

well trackback i got out of school early ;) yeah babes cause i had an appointment so my mummy picks me up from school we go finish the thingy in freakin 5 minutes....but it took about 45 minutes to reach....damn i could have done what the doctor did in 5 minutes by myself...so useless and waste of time...anywhooo we decided to get lunch for my baby sister who is currently feeling sick since she just got shots....oh yes a check up cause inshallah she'll be heading out for school next year yeah.... i cant wait to walk her to kindergarten ohhhhh that will be the life me in my last year and my lovely sugar will be there :)....

back to the story so my mummy gives me the cash and i go order from the resturant, and all this time i'm in my school uniform ok...well i get in and literally all i see are guys all waiting, me the only gal there....got scary but not the point...so i stand in line like most decent people would have done...and this guy in uniform, police or something in the navy all of a sudden talks to me...i'm like in my brain mumbling "wtf do you want seriously, did i say i want to talk....i thought he was the rude kind but think again..." so he tells me "oh come on, you get in front of me ishd3wah, its ok....(why i dont know maybe because i was young or watever and he felt i duno...) well at that moment i was like "no no its ok no wallah i dont mind standing"...but no he doesnt take no for an answer so i freakin go ahead order and wait...and then everything goes ackward i tell him mashkoor and well thank you...my order is called out, go grab the food and then depart with a smile on my face....that's when i realized how we still have kind, decent men in our country :)...brightening up the day...then again i guess i over went with it, its just a kind gesture right?:P

now why i wrote a post about it i have no idea.... :P

i shall say adios for awhile, have to study for my chemistry test, and no purgatory its not always a chemistry test, algebra too, history, english, etc you name it i got it...inshallah all goes well, so how was your day compared to mine, adventrous i know ;) ...

listening to Nawal's latest album, love it.... ;) and i found a song thats got me on replay "Fi Elbidaya..., when i finish her enter cd ill see what else :) anywhoo enjoy the day and sweet dreams !

Tear It Up

No one has faith in you
See they underestimate your abilities
But come the morrow you'll be the sun
And their voices be constrained
Your nothing in this body called not yours
The madness escalates
Demand satisfication
This disease is hard to cure
Your emotions are the fuel that makes them burn
Nothing can destroy this pleasure thats unforgetable
You've been used, abused
Not known for your truth
Birdie fly high above those decietful eyes
In the end all is never well
Fairy tales end in hell
Finally
Endlessly
Never known to those that care
But before your eyes
I am still there
Look into my mirror
I'll stand by you
Yours truly
The battlefield


-your battlefield-

-------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------

"nothing is like today...this day the truth was revealed, its hard to be erased, decieved, concieved, all and all, you die they are born....never again path is torn."

....disconnected....

I have just noticed that my blog has actually been a diary.....thats kept track of my being....dont try to spend the time to comprehend what i speak because this is just my ideal non being, all i am is what i want to be.....blind with words, harm seeks the truth and doodled breathlessly....

----not to be continued----

You Do It Again....

For Your Eyes Only!
Those dark eyes the shade of ....
and that face that shines in the moonlight
when everything never seems to go wrong
only that your just too right
Now what do you see when you look into me?
(the doodle speaking)
Attraction or Boredom
So Yesterday?

~*Your Battlefield*~


4 days left ...!!!!!
______________________________________________________________________
"Everybody thinks your well, everybody thinks i'm ill, watching me fall apart, falling under your spell. But your fooling yourself.....cause you say you love me and then you do it again....you say your sorry's then you do it again....again, again, again"
-travis---reoffender-

Better Days.....Repeat Yesterday

lastest doodle, created while listening to what? goo goo dolls.....ofcourse those are lyrics...not my own words......my handwriting needs to change...its fugly... so what else is new with me?

yesterday, i thought some sleep will end my tiresome week beautifully...well the first 4 hours of sleep did but why oh why did i continue and not stay awake....so i slept from 7 pm to well today i woke up at 9 am.....so about 13 freakin hours of sleep....i hated every extra minute of it....every extra minute....i wasted all those minutes drifting from dream to dreams.....niether of them brigthening my mood nor creating something worth the while.....anyways my nonsense let it not confuse you....i shall end my nightmare right here in between my words...

and last i leave you to chase the answers to your unknown questions....breathless and waiting------>my nonsense will wear off come 5 more days inshallah till then entertain me~!

nothing more for know.....will think of something later

-Your Battlefield-

P.S: i never use note cards for taking notes.....hmmm i wasted packs on doodles, what can i do?or say to that matter only that i never like to follow instructions...!!!!

Without You Here

..........my latest obession......goo goo dolls........



its dead, its fray,
they're no longer the same
the difference, the distance
is so far from away
her whispers his silence
destroys her dying pain
his words ,
the victim slowly cries her shame
the wise, the foolish
debating who remains
his smile
her tears
begin to drift away
the end the begining
never feels the same


-Your Battlefield-

that was a short poem by me....well whats new today....not feeling great....no longer the same i guess my energy is draining itself away. i can no longer bare this wait any longer....i feel asleep yesterday and well in hope of a dream that will brighten my day unfortunately a nightmare was all i found....if your thinking its of .... its not...its about something that happened to me earlier and i hope it dosent .... i shall let it rest and forget about it anywhoo.....am tired and weary and 6 more days till inshallah the sunshine blocks the rain....and i wish it rains the weather is woooo...!

:(

Do You Have A Little Time

listen to the voice
that has me on replay
;)

-Your Battlefield-
(click on my name and you'll be directed to it)
:)

this post is boring....so sad!
sorry for the inconvience
it just i'm low on energy all because of that
research paper.....yes i wrote 9 pages of bs
with style hehehehoooe

"somedooueboo"
:P


小飛象

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
hehehehoooe

.....7.....more days to go :*

won't blame yah if you are questioning my sanity :P

Question Me.....No Its You ;)

i use post its but not for the reason most of you use them for....i doodle all over them hehehe....lets just say i have wasted many packs of those :P this is a doodle post it in my daily planner yes i keep one but i sadly havent written in it since december...damn the winter vacation changed me hehehe :P should i post more of them .... fine if you say so ;p hehe excuse me if they are horizontal or etc thats the way they were in the planner and i didnt feel like rotating them to make them look straight sorry :P i would have pasted the whole page but blogger hates loading that big of files :P

hmmm i have to write a research paper 8 pages long on someduoopeedo... ;) and i need a way to stay awake, alert and breathing through the process any ideas..... please nothing illegal hehehe :OP and i have to turn it in exactly hmmm 24 hours no less... ;P
away from me and to my ever so charming commentors....i love you guys...you all make me smile, feel cheerful and your presence on my blog brightens up my day....thank you ;*

Now for my new questions, they arent that good as the first bunch but bare with me...heheh till something more streams through my mind i will ask....but answer these with your true heart :P!

Would you reject the one who cares for you but you not for them and try to pursue those far from your grasp who know nothing of your existence.....?

Are you innocent or guilty as of this day??explain!! :P

I THINK I OVER DID IT WITH THE POST IT....I NEVER SAVE SOME FOR LATER..
OOOPS TELL ME DO YOU LIKE THEM OR ARE THEY A NO NO....LOVE FEEDBACK
they look unusal only because i formed the faces with lines and the features just appear a la natural :* thanks for stopping by

It Just Didnt Seem Right !!

please scoot over am tired and weary and need to rest the soles of my shoes....am battered and torn apart by this feeling......ooooof it wasnt supposed to go that way....?!! i guess all is what was meant to be!!

so was your day more tiring or was mine? i'll save you a seat beside that man?

i sat in a chair from 7:30 till 12:40 taking a test we shall rest its name.....damn my gluteus maximus was soar and sleeping heheheheh and i have a terrible headache and writers cramp...!! i forgot how to write my own name.....thats how stressed i was....and who cursive what nooo your arent seriously oh damn.... however after it i was anxious to purchase the book called girl with pearl earrings which was inspired by the painting by johannes vermeer....apparently theirs a movie also i guess i will eventually ask jackie to download what would i do without her :o)....

well i am done my count down and begun a new one....lets see how many more days till my ....... is back home with me hmmmmm 9 more days....inshallah all goes well....am missing ...... so much ! XOXOX

im on a new page in my life...come what may i will be prepared and with a smile no matter what obstacle life decides to challenge against me....inshallah with time my words will be clear but till then do not worry if you dont understand what im blabbing about.....cause i dont either hehehe :op

am so happy i had so many responses to my stupid questions glad people took the time in their day to answer......and my replies were hehehehe..... i sounded like a pscyhologist analyzing her patients lives....it was so much fun am going to come up with some more eventually and post them......

oh yea and apparently you know the contest thingy well if no one else submits a thing for the cover then im the winner.....i feel so sad about that....am the only one so its not even a victory for me.....no one is competing against me i guess im invincble and no one wants to challenge me....come on i hate easy battles won without a fight....i guess i should be happy but am not....!!!

cheer me up!!

Six Questions Waiting For Replies

would you conceal your intentions or blurt out the truth?

would you fall in love or just feel rest assured?

would you cry yourself to sleep if everything went wrong?

would you listen to your nonsense and reply with a smirk?

would you lie to yourself or just smile in the chaos?

would you be the criminal or the victim in this case.....?

anwers people answers......give me the answers to my rhyming words i want to know....

DONT BE SCARED LEAVE A REPLY I SERIOUSLY AM NOT GOING TO BITE.....

NOT THIS TIME
:)

I Got To Go Away

yesterday i came home from a hectic day at school and curled up in my cozy, soft bed , put the ac on low and made my own ice age....anywhoo i was hoping to close my eyes for a couple of hours but i ended up sleeping till 1 am when i went to bed at 5 pm talk about well rested. NOT!

why i had to say that is out of my mind just thought maybe someone might wonder....hehehe so anyways am quite happy that you guys liked my doodle zizotime, the stallion, and purgatory....the only commentors on that post but still really appreicated those comments.....they all made me smile and giggle :P but yet have not got feedback on the comment to your comment regarding the ATTENTION part....guess none of you want anywhoo....

so when i woke up at 1 am.....i missed out on dinner thank god they were still awake so i asked for some dinner too lazy to go make myself something tasty and when i get my dinner....it tastes :( so i ended up eating brownies and drinking mountain dew......sounds unhealthy it is.

so i had so much time to waste too hyper and no sleep came to me so i check the safat site browse blogs etc....and then i decide to open the paint program that all of you i believe have on the pc....anywho and i begin to doodle and make somethings out of nothing....look at them closely they're faces in most of the creations just concentrate baby and you'll see i wish i could explain my creations but its hard when i type it has to be all said.....oh well inshallah one day when all goes well hell maybe i will make a gallery of my artwork :) am thinking to much of my stupid drawings they arent master material just crappy anyways...what else is new?/!/do you like this form of art or stick to doodles, and portrait drawings?@?

look for faces......faces.......faces..........anything that has eyes ears nose lips mouth cuz babe i incorportated all of that in all my abstract work all done in paint ohhhh how i love that program....:P

and i just finished watching one tree hill season finale and let me tell you.....am shocked....and addicted to the song they played in the climax of the eposide by led zeppelin-baby im gonna leave you.......it's currently playing replay on my itune list ooof am gonna lose myself in its tune for just one day and then simply let it go...sad

this one look and spot the one eye looking away from you
so *$%$ing amazing huh i know i applaud myself it is so mashallah out of the
world my best illusional creation ever.....hope to make more of these tell me what you think of this one i dont care about the rest this one is the one i fell in love with it took sometime to create but in the end my work pays off :P

do you love me???hehehe

next post i will use a red pen on paint and show you the hidden faces how bout that :P

I Was Never Insane For You

this doodle
is decidated to you, no not you the other you
hidden behind that illusional mask
the truth lies behind it and breathes through me
because in the end i know deep down
inside that black heart you love me
but for now i love you.....

-Your Battlefield-

3ain Jar7e Part One

First of all if you are not fond of continuations.....dont bother reading the below, if you wish not to read about pain, dont read the following but your battlefield kindly wishes you read her short jibberish words and give her feedback on how to improve and what you liked :*.

..............May 2 1897.............Session 1

..............Recording.........videotape 180 minutes:-

Twenty six year old woman settles herself on the black sturdy leather couch, takes a deep agonizing breath bracing herself and looks into the camera. Her body is covered with scars, bruises and yet her eyes unmistakenably glisten some sort of feeling. Though her skin seems abused, and tainted she still looks like a beauty with the most alluring face seen throughtout the study.

[Dr. Destructivalle adjusts his spectacles, feels her undefinable presence and then gentley asks her, "What ales you my dear, please tell me and stop whenever it gets uncomfortable."]

Takes in a deep steady breathe

You see ever since that day, I can no longer see, my eyes were or are the shade of the deep icy sea as mummy used to say. Ohh how i miss her and without her feel like an overused bottle. Easily dispensed without a mere glimpse from their eyes.

My eyesight.... I was blinded by something, someone and somewhere though my memory dosent serve me well these days. But I remember.....I remember watching that handsome man, the most beautiful man my blue eyes every saw. I felt pleasured to be present near him, but then.....

Her icy blue eyes thirst in the water, softly and ever so gentley, tears trickle on her cheeks.

Just yesterday I saw him lure his victim laying.....he laid her mutilated body upon the muddy sand, and...and his fingers still bore her heart's blood. I couldnt help myself, I softly wepted for her, how can he do such a thing?!.

You see I am an observer, and quite a great listener....every relationship I ever has ended in the gutter because I was too perfect, the ideal woman, ms goody two shoes until I met him. He understood my intentions, and well he decided that I might like his affections laid on me. Am being incoherent only because at that time and still that same scene replays through my mind.

Pauses.....contemplating her thoughts, uses the kleenex that was folded in her lap to wipe those stinging tears.

I wished it was me, how sad can I get.....my last wishes were to be destroyed by a strong, cynical man whose pleasures seemed to always be more imporatnt. Maybe it was just the medications playing their role in my system, making me visual unseen events but if you were to ask me how this man looks like, i'd say " 6 feet tall, musclar overpowering tan body that looked like he worked endlessly under the heat of the sun lifting timber and looked handsome as he sweated. His dark hazel eyes, ohhhh those eyes could foreshadow anyones doom.....but damn, he never looked my way until the last endless moments. That is for my benefit because I just witnessed his unholy criminal act!

All is quiet for a few minutes that seemed like endless hours and then she spoke in the softest whisper Dr. Destructivalle ever heard.

I can still hear her faint screams secluding the isolated beach. I saw him grabbing her, molding her body in his hands and then he began to slowly ...........

to be continued.....

short story by me inshallah after the next 5 days of chaos are over for me i will have time to continue and create a continuation....feedback is always appreciated by ... thanks for stopping by.....each and every one of you ;) love